The Talk

   As I walked to Smile Africa yesterday morning, I prayed. I prayed for Betty, Bogere, and Caleb. I was asking God to give me the words to say to them when I leave. I didn't want it to be a sad thing, but I knew that everyone's heart was going to break. I needed to tell Bogere that I was leaving soon. I have told Betty already because she is older and understands. She also speaks better english, so it was easy for me to just tell her. The longer I waited to tell Bogere, the more unfair it was to him. When Pastor Ruth arrived at Smile, then I brought the kids in the office to have the talk.

   At first I was just helping to cut some fruit to give to my kids in the morning. I gave them the fruit and helped make lunch for Ruth and myself. While I was doing that, Ruth had a few quick meetings that she had to attend. Finally the lunch preparations were over and the meetings had finished. Mama Ruth looked at me...it was time.

   I put Bogere on my lap, said a quick prayer in my head and started speaking. Although Bogere and I can communicate, I needed Pastor Ruth's help to translate all that I was saying. I haven't not mastered Swahili yet and I needed Bogere to hear EVERYTHING that I was saying. I knew that if I made the conversation sad and serious, then that was how Bogere was going to take it. I needed the conversation to be light hearted. So this is what I said,

"Bogere, I am leaving Smile Africa in 3 weeks. I have to go back to America so that I can finish school and see my family. But I am going to come back and visit you. I promise! You are a good boy and you haven't done anything wrong. You are going to start school in February and so am I! So we will both be doing school and then when we finish, I will come visit you. While I am back in America I will call you sometimes too. You be a good boy and listen to the teachers, okay?"

   That is the basics of what I said. That isn't word for word, but it went something like that. After I said a sentence, Pastor Ruth translated it for me. Just to make sure that Bogere understood everything. I watched his face as Ruth told him what was going on. Bogere fought back tears. He blinked really fast, hoping that tears would not fall. I looked at his chest and watched his heart beat faster and faster. My heart was breaking. This was really hard. I did not want to do this. When Ruth finished explaining to him the situation, I hugged him tightly and he rested his head on my shoulder. Then I looked at Ruth. I didn't know who was going to cry first, Bogere or Ruth. 

"Jesus, thank you for the strength to talk to Bogere without crying. Thank you for keeping me strong. I pray God that my last 3 weeks here will be great. Please protect Bogere's little heart. Keep him strong. I know that it will be hard for both of us. So please, keep both of us strong. I love you. Amen."