Baby Steps

Yesterday was a rough day in the parenting department. Bogere would not listen to any teacher at Smile Africa, he began hitting his friends and making a scene. All this happened while I went into the office for about 5 minutes. When I returned, a few of the teachers complained to me about Bogere's behavior and how frustrated they were that he doesn't listen to them. The teachers expressed to me that their biggest worry for Bogere is that he is a leader. All of the other children do everything this boy says without question, which can be dangerous if Bogere is leading them the wrong direction. I called Bogere to come over to me, but he did not listen to me either. Once he came over I asked him to apologize to Michael, a teacher at Smile, but Bogere refused to do so. At that moment I knew that this was going to be a rough day for Mr. Bogere, but a very important one. I was not going to demand him to apologize. When I told him that he was not allowed to each lunch with me because he refused to apologize when I asked him to and he because he did not listen to the other teachers, Bogere threw a tantrum. Which I completely ignored. I simply walked away from him and went about my business. I knew that all he wanted was my attention, but I was not going to give it to him. Once he realized that I was not apart of the audience that was watching him wail, he decided to calm down. Bogere went into the babies room where I was and sat quietly. Once it was time for lunch and I told him to go and eat with his friends, he realized that I was serious about his punishment and he threw another fit and then said, "Sorry Michael". As annoying as this whole situation was, it was important to me that he realized that he needed to say sorry when I asked him to, not when he felt like it or when he thought the punishment was real. Bogere needed to realize that there are consequences to every action, good and bad. When he was nice to the other kids and he shared his stuff, then he got my positive attention, but when he was acting crazy and not listening, then he did not get my attention at all, which is what he wants. I sent him out with the other kids to eat and I went into the office with the other teachers to eat lunch. A teacher came to me and told me that Bogere was refusing to eat. I just said, "Well that's a bummer. I bet he will be first in line tomorrow for breakfast." Bogere also needed to learn that just because he was going to throw a tantrum and refuse to eat because he was upset, does not mean that I was going to cater to the drama and give him food. That kind of behavior does not get rewarded. After that whole catastrophe was over, Bogere calmed down and played with the other kids and was happy again. That was a really rough situation. I love him so much and I want him to be happy and to eat, but this was an important lesson that he needed to learn. Come December he will not have anyone to teach him how to properly behave, so this one on one discipline is so important for him. I was exhausted from dealing with the drama, so I went back into the babies room and carried baby Ruth. I laid down and we both fell asleep!

It was a very long day, and an exhausting one at that. Bogere is not perfect, and not near where he should be yet, but he is learning and is doing a great job! I am so proud of him. That boy is a born leader and once he realizes the man of God that he can be, there is no telling what he can do. No major change is done over night, it takes BABY STEPS, but we can do it! "We can do all things through Christ who gives us strengthen!" Philippians 4:13

(Me holding baby Ruth's feet)